Dan Jamieson: Ham Yard Hate Plates
Forthcoming exhibition
Works
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Dan Jamieson, I am sorry that I do not share your enthusiasm for your new dog -
Dan Jamieson, Do not fucking stop me when I suggest to order 3 more bottles of rosé at 3am
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Dan Jamieson, Do not talk to me while I am licking delicious doritos dust from my fingers
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Dan Jamieson, A packet of percy pigs and a wank will have to do
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Dan Jamieson, Drunk dancing is so much better with you
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Dan Jamieson, I am sorry for our friend's cunty behaviour. They vape
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Dan Jamieson, I am very much looking forward to cancelling the plans you made
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A steak bake and a wank will have to do
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Dan Jamieson, Oh Christ. Please do not suggest to crash on the vintage sofa
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Dan Jamieson, I regret inviting people round
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Dan Jamieson, I'd rather be at home eating crisps in bed
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Dan Jamieson, I'm not sure now is the right time to fight for your right to party at the afternoon drinks do
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A vegan steak bake and a wank will have to do
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Dan Jamieson, Keep topping me up and I will tolerate your company
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Dan Jamieson, Mr and Mrs shit taste in interior design
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Dan Jamieson, Oh Christ this was meant to be just an afternoon thing not an all-fucking-nighter
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Dan Jamieson, No one cares about what part of wherever the wine came from
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Dan Jamieson, A scotch egg and a wank will have to do
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Dan Jamieson, Now is not an appropriate time to interrupt the well thought out quiet get together playlist with Firestarter on repeat
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Dan Jamieson, Now is probably not the best time to interrupt the silence with I Say Boom Boom Boom Let Me Hear You Say Wayo
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Dan Jamieson, Now might not be the most appropriate moment to dab 'just a bit of MD
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Now might not be the most appropriate time to whatsapp your dealer
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Dan Jamieson, Oh Christ. Just pour the fucking wine already
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Dan Jamieson, Oh Christ. Not this fucking story again
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Dan Jamieson, Oh do shut the fuck up about your lovely time away and how it was just what you needed
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Dan Jamieson, Oh do shut the fuck up about your tasteless new extension
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Dan Jamieson, Oh fuck your seating plan
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Dan Jamieson, Painfully pointless prosecco party
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Dan Jamieson, Please be more careful with your cab sav around my Balenciagas
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Dan Jamieson, Please be more careful with your merlot around my new Nikes
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Dan Jamieson, Please do not ash on the monstera plant
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Dan Jamieson, Please do not blame the dog on your dank dance floor fart
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Dan Jamieson, Please do not bring your boring work problems to the party
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Dan Jamieson, Please do not go to the trouble of showing us your dance routine
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Dan Jamieson, Please do not text your dealer. This was meant to be a simple drinks do
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Dan Jamieson, Please do not worry it was not sentimental just rather fucking expensive
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Dan Jamieson, Please help yourself to drinks as we see you've arrived empty handed again
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Dan Jamieson, Sorry Darling, there were no sodding Shrigleys left, so I got you this.
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Please do not ash on the monstera plant
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Dan Jamieson, Thank you for coming. We wished you had left hours ago
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Dan Jamieson, The coasters are there for a fucking reason
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This hate plate is to quitely tell you to fuck off
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Dan Jamieson, We are all thrilled you have brought cheap corner shop wine
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Dan Jamieson, We are sorry but posting shit pictures of your mediocre living room does not make you an interior designer
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Dan Jamieson, We are sorry to say that you have exceeded your more than generous fart quota for the day
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Dan Jamieson, We bought this artwork as our dog, who has impeccable taste, wagged its tail at it with utmost enthusiasm
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Dan Jamieson, We won't forget your red wine spill
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Dan Jamieson, When I said sorry I am busy I meant i did not want to come
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Dan Jamieson, When is the earliest I can tell everyone to leave
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Dan Jamieson, Who drank all the fucking rosé
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Dan Jamieson, Your verbal diarrhoea is not welcome here
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Dan Jamieson, You are not a fucking interior designer
