• Dan Jamieson, Fuck your fucking smoothies I am making marvellous margaritas and having fun.
    Fuck your fucking smoothies I am making marvellous margaritas and having fun.
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  • Dan Jamieson, I am only here to steal your wine, flirt and gossip.
    I am only here to steal your wine, flirt and gossip.
  • Dan Jamieson, Not this fucking story again.
    Not this fucking story again.
  • Dan Jamieson, Oh do please stop your wanky waffling and pour the yummy wine.
    Oh do please stop your wanky waffling and pour the yummy wine.
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  • Dan Jamieson, Oh fuck no, I wasn't flirting, I was just being Northern.
    Oh fuck no, I wasn't flirting, I was just being Northern.
    Sold
  • Dan Jamieson, Please do not invite yourself round. We are forever busy.
    Please do not invite yourself round. We are forever busy.
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  • Dan Jamieson, Please do not kill the vibe with your ghastly inappropriate confession.
    Please do not kill the vibe with your ghastly inappropriate confession.
  • Dan Jamieson, Please do not throw up on the rug. It is vintage.
    Please do not throw up on the rug. It is vintage.
  • Dan Jamieson, Reach for the second bottle of wine (and pop a third in the fridge just in case).
    Reach for the second bottle of wine (and pop a third in the fridge just in case).
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  • Dan Jamieson, So sorry but you will just have to put up with me for I am a moody mother fucker.
    So sorry but you will just have to put up with me for I am a moody mother fucker.
  • Dan Jamieson, Sorry darling, there we no sodding Shrigleys left, so I got you this.
    Sorry darling, there we no sodding Shrigleys left, so I got you this.
  • Dan Jamieson, You are as predictable as finding a naff collection of shells on display in a seaside air bnb.
    You are as predictable as finding a naff collection of shells on display in a seaside air bnb.