Hate Plates
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Oh that's great you're trying hackney but we know you predrink to ed sheeran and uber to clapham. (S) -
Please do not sour the mood with your attention seeking insecurities. (S)
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Please, I am trying my best to enjoy the well reviewed subtitled movie. (S)
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Sorry but I need to wait at least 4 hours to reply to make it appear I am terribly busy. (S)
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Oh Christ. This was meant to be just an afternoon thing not an all-fucking-nighter. (S)
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Oh do shut the fuck up about your lovely time away and how it was just what you needed. (S)
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Oh do shut the fuck up about your tremendously tasteless new extension. (M)
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Please, i am pretending to enjoy the natural wine. (M)
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We will never, ever forget your clumsy and avoidable red wine 'accident'. (M)
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Please take the unsubtle hints and order a fucking cab as we are bored talking about your child reaching its many milestones. (M)
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We must confess we only came to guzzle your wonderful face slapping home made cocktails, finish off your overpriced crisps, drunk sexy dance and generally shit stir. (XL)
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Sorry those napkins are for a different calibre of guest. We have outdated novelty kitchen roll for you. (XL)
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Please do not leave me desperately making conversation with your parents. (XL)
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Yes the rumour is true. i only came to drink your wine, flirt and gossip. (XL)
